20 - National Treasures (2004-2007)

This is the full movie commentary for Shitty Movie Showdown! episode 20 - National Treasure 1 & 2. If you want to watch the review, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=It7xVs080hc

Phoenix knew he'd have to suffer through National Treasure so he figured he'd get both of the movies out of the way at the same time. He watches both 1 & 2 at the exact same time and managed to keep track of these intense movies with intricate plots. Do you buy that? They're just Indiana Jones meets Da Vinci Code. Minus all the fun and intrigue of both of those franchises.

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19 - The Wicker Man (2006)

This is the full movie commentary from Shitty Movie Showdown! To see the review episode, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mALQY9B3YM&index=2&list=PLzB_ChIs4K6iraFlTGM_yAi23kPtGTodm

The Wicker Man is one of the best Cage freakout movies. Do you love seeing women get punched in the goddamn face over and over? This is your movie. Also, learn to like less psychopathic things. Anyway, this is Phoenix watching the entire movie and making fun of it MST3K style.

18 - USS Indianpolis: Men Of Courage (2016)

This is the full movie commentary for USS Indianapolis. For the actual Shitty Movie Showdown! review, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lB12m8I_L-0

It's a real Cage match in this film. Sharks vs. Cage. True story. In this movie, Cage is the captain of the titular ship on an ill fated journey back home. But it all ends well for Cage....oh....oh god no. Just watch this. Or, better yet. Watch Phoenix West watch this.

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17 - Industrial Symphony No. 1: The Ballad Of The Brokenhearted (1990)

This is the entire movie Industrial Symphony No. 1: The Dream Of The Brokenhearted from 1990 with video commentary from Shitty Movie Showdown! via Nic Cage Cast. To watch the SMS! review episode of Industrial Symphony, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlX4DWSNzsw&t=428s

Industrial Symphony No. 1: The Ballad Of The Brokenhearted is a passion project made by noted human David Lynch. In this, Nic Cage stars in the opening scene before never being seen again. It was a load of shit putting this on his IMDb page. In this production, a lot of ambigious shit happens without any change of nearing an answer. This is mean to make you feel like the piece has a deeper meaning than your understanding can grasp. In reality, it's because David Lynch cannot make coherent pieces on his own. How can you tell if he has fucked up if none of it really adds up? You can't. But he's one thing...human. That's for sure.

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10: Death Machines (1976)

This is the entire movie Death Machines from 1976 with video commentary from Shitty Movie Showdown! To watch the SMS! review episode of Death Machines, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pPlCNMYi50

Death Machines was about how badass the 70’s were. It featured assassins that may or may not be robots killing people or just shoving them down to the ground. Our hero is a tremendous asshole that leaves his girlfriend at a gas station. His name is Frank Thomas and no… it isn’t the White Sox legend. www.LIWstudios.com for more shows

8 - Dark Angel & I Come In Peace (1990)

This is the full movie commentary for both Dark Angel and I Come In Peace.

Things are different this time. Brent watched the 1990 film 'Dark Angel' starring Dolph Lundgren in which an alien comes to America to forcibly deal narcotics. Dolph also attempts to find love with the city's coroner. One problem...she's his ex... Phoenix also watched a movie called "I Come In Peace" from 1990 in which Dolph Lundgren partners up with the guy from Dream On to stop an alien from out space that is bent on giving citizens overdoses of heroin. Dolph also must find a way to break off every plan he makes with his on-again-off-again girlfriend, the coroner of Houston.

Both movies are eerily similar. Phoenix and Brent both provide commentary while recording at different times in different places. To see the full official Shitty Movie Showdown! episode, subscribe to this page!

6 - Hick Trek: The Moovie ('1999')

This is the entire movie Hick Trek: The Moovie from 1999 with video commentary from Shitty Movie Showdown! To watch the SMS! review episode of Hick Trek, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXwzm3ti3Zc

Hick Trek: The Moovie is a Star Trek spoof with hicks. That’s pretty much it. Oh, they have to stop cats from blowing up a planet with a cottage cheese and pineapple bomb. It’s way better than it sounds and the gang ended up liking the movie.

5 - Rise Of The Black Bat (2012)

This is the entire movie Rise Of The Black Bat from 2012 with commentary from Shitty Movie Showdown! To watch the SMS! review episode for Rise Of The Black Bat, click HERE: Rise Of The Black Bat is about all those superheroes you know and love. Put them in a blender and you get this. What’s that? You forgot to toss money into the blender? Oh well, shoot the movie with nobodies and don’t bother lighting the shots or recording dialogue. It’ll work out, trust me.

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3 - Halloween III: Season Of The Witch (1982)

In this video, we watched Halloween III: Season Of The Witch and tore it apart with live video commentary. This was originally from Shitty Movie Showdown! episode 3. What makes horror movies great? The villain right? And the original Halloween has a great villain with Michael Myers. So obviously it only made sense to remove him entirely and replace him with Irish people stealing Stonehenge to kill children with masks. It. Just. Makes. Sense. Can Detective Doctor overcome the Irish bad guys while maintaining a three beer buzz and keep his dick wet the entire time? Find out with us!

P.S. - I hear this video is blocked in Canada and the U.S.

1B - Hired To Kill (1990)

This is the full movie commentary for Hired To Kill. To see the review, check out Shitty Movie Showdown! episode 1.

Hired To Kill was an amazing piece of muscle covered shit. It was part awesome movie and bigger part confusing mess. Who is the star of this movie? Peter Dinklage mixed with Matt Damon? Correct. Now that we got that settled, watch his homophobic character kick-ass.... wait... let's be accurate. Watch as he slowly walks around while female models do all the shooting and heavy lifting. He was... hired to kill. And he did not. Spoiler alert. He doesn't kill even though he was hired to do exactly that. What a failure.

1A - Puppetmaster X: Axis Rising (2012)

Puppetmaster X: Axis Rising was the very first movie we were forced into watching under threat of death for Shitty Movie Showdown! The entire experience was recorded via security camera. Well, sort of. Some of the camera footage was lost but the audio remained. So it's weird. It is a seamless loss though so don't you worry, internet stranger. Feel free to leave your terrible thoughts below as if we would give a single shit about that sort of petty nonsense. I mean...we love you.