48: Halloween Part 2 (105)

We finally start to hint at what Tate has done with these ghosts from an episode of Are You Afraid Of The Dark? We also spend a lot of time on home decoration and sad ghosts.

47: Halloween Part 1 (104)

The dead can walk amongst us all and therefor kill us all on Halloween. Wouldn’t that mean we’d have a zillion murders on Halloween? This is a terrifying world like the Purge. Anyway, we are introduced to Chad and Pat and they like to argue and will continue to do so for the remainder of the season.

46: Murder House (103)

Come take the Murder House tour with me. Watch as Ben falls asleep during a therapy session! Watch in horror as Moira presents herself like an animal in the wild. Cover your eyes as Violet and Viv tour an apartment!! And you won’t want to miss the finale of the Murder House tour as Ben and Viv argue about finances!!! The horror!

45: Home Invasion (102)

Georgia would hate this episode. If you love getting anti-preggers then this is your episode. It also has inept copycat murderers and mature porn.

44: Pilot (101)

I didn’t realize how rushed this episode is but this is my third/fourth watch through and it’s in a rush to get you to the actual plot. Masturbating in front of a window is good therapy. I wish I saw everyone as young Moira because life would be better. Glad to finally be getting around to season 1 so enjoy! This episode is longer than I’d like but the first episode of a season is always full of setup.

43: Apocalypse Then (810)

Perhaps the last episode of this show. The podcast not the actual TV show. Not sure yet. But let's finish it off the same exact way Avengers Endgame does but without the budget or viewers. Time travel demon smashers away!

42: Fire And Reign (809)

This is my full-circle episode where I finally get my Kathy Bates Flesh-bot that I've been talking about for 5 years now which is an insane and true statement. How is that possible? Also, this is the shortest episode ever.

41: Sojourn (808)

Is this the first clip from an AHS episode played on the show? Possibly. I really don't know. It was important to hear the insane line stated. I demand a back-story season to know what the Satanic lady did to deserve to burn in the worst part of hell.

40: Traitor (807)

Voodoo heart surgery. 80's VHS horror movie made in 2015 for some reason. Mind reading for no reason. Voodoo hell is apparenlty awesome. Death of flesh and blood Kathy Bates character. Not flesh-bot Kathy.

39: Return To Murder House (806)

FINALLY. We get to see him tearjerk! Oh, and we also see the rest of our characters from season 1. Plus a man with the most badass title I've ever heard in my life.

38: Boy Wonder (805)

I talk about my awesome podcast listeners for my show "Wet Throats" which is out every Tuesday. Also this episode has zombies for no reason. CGI deer better than The Walking Dead. Leslie Grossman is not a teenager so why did they write her as one? She as born before Dark Side Of The Moon was released. Not a teenager.

37: Could It Be... Satan? (804)

Get your breakfast ready, say your satanic prayers and devour your pancakes while you listen to this podcast. We finally get some backstory on Lestat the demon vampire man-child.

35: The Morning After (802)

Watching a man in a rubber gimp suit plow Evan Peters from behind is a great way to end the career of such an elegant actress. Seriously, how does the Rubber Man make any sense in this storyline?

34: The End (801)

The world ends and only attractive gay men survive. Plus everyone looks like a Matrix vampire or something. I will say this about season 8: Apocalypse... so far so good. Much, much better than the Freak Show season. Much.

33: Great Again (711)

Another season of AHS has come to an end and for the first time in several years, I'm sad. This season was fucking great and I say that with confidence. I figure it's only fair that I shit on it when it's bad, I should proclaim my love when it's great. Can we somehow give Evan Peters an Oscar for a TV show? Let's make it happen. Let's make the Oscars great again. It feels weird to be this positive in a podcast description. It's making me feel funny.

31: Drink The Kool-Aid (709)

Whenever I get together with friends we play the "drink poison Kool-Aid out of a small paper cup and see who is willing to die for me but only to have it turn out to be regular Kool-Aid" game. It's a lot of fun.

29: Valerie Solanis Died For Your Sins: Scumbag (707)

Thank you for reading this podcast description. If you are a woman then you are a magical creature. If you are a man... how dare you read this you SCUM? You turd. You scummy turd. Valeria Solanis is coming for you. Well, not anymore because she died for your sins. So you're welcome. Or something like that. It doesn't really make sense.