We tried to talk about the Titanic but you already know it all. George Roy Hill directed this solid episode of live television from 1956. Hint: the fucker sinks.
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35: Tales From The Cryptkeeper - 304 - Unpopular Mechanics
I hate this show. It’s official. I used to be kinda surprised by some of the cartoon episodes but it appears to be dead. How does a blender work after being unplugged? How does a plug in tea kettle that you have to also keep on the stove work? Bad.
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34: Suspense - 543 - Nightmare At Ground Zero (Live)
Rod Serling wrote this episode of Suspense. It was not suspenseful. It was not good. It was a nightmare and we wish we were at ground zero.
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33: Hammer House Of Horror - 103 - Rude Awakening
Sorry, this episode was a bummer to do. We will make it up to you. Maybe an extra Tales From The Crypt episode? Will that work? Forgive us.
You can view this episode on YouTube here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9_xRMT5T5k
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32: Alcoa-Goodyear Theatre - The Afternoon Beast (based on Charles Beaumont story)
I mean….c’mon. He owns this boy right? He is grooming him right? It’s just creepy and everyone limps. What the hell did we watch?? Phoenix, Dick and Frank Linkz review whatever this was.
You can see this episode on YouTube here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZXFPk_twRE
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31: Dow Hour Of Great Mysteries - 101 - The Bat (Live)
What was this? Agatha Christie’s version of Ghostbusters 2016? Everyone needed to shut up and just stay in one spot. Much easier to eliminate the murder that way. Adam didn’t watch the episode but now that we have discussed it he’s glad he didn’t. This episode of Dow Hour Of Great Mysteries is free on YouTube so go watch it then listen to our commentary on the Patreon page and this review here.
You can watch The Bat on YouTube here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mClkknsvC4
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30: Tales From The Crypt - 305 - Top Billing (Live)
Writing this weeks ahead of time but this is Dick’s pick of his #1 Tales From The Crypt episode. For some reason he thought Jon Lovitz was deserving of the top spot. Is it dogshit? Probably but we shall find out!
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29: Alfred Hitchcock Presents 1985 - 108 - Breakdown (Live)
Let’s talk about this remake of the Alfred Hitchcock classic we covered on episode 27. Let’s see how dated this 80’s episode is. The 60’s episode isn’t dated. The 80’s were fuck.
You can watch Breakdown on YouTube here;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQG6onyZUbg
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28: Tales From The Crypt - 410 - Maniac At Large (Live)
I am writing this summary BEFORE we watch and review the episode. It’s the only John Frankenheimer episode of TFTC and here is my (Phoenix) prediction: it’ll still be terrible. Directing doesn’t matter on this show when the stories are so lame. In 10 hours I will finally find out what the Frankenheimer episode is like and I just know it’s going to bum me out.
Update: we recorded the podcast last night and Adam hated it for some reason. It was okay. Bye Jansen.
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27: Alfred Hitchcock Presents - 107 - Breakdown (Live)
It was Adam’s turn to pick and he had to choose from all of the episodes of the 1955 series Alfred Hitchcock Presents. He picked a good one. Breakdown is just terrifying and everyone can relate to this fear.
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26: The Outer Limits - 105 - The Sixth Finger (Live)
Jansen picked this one. Possibly due to the minor/miner confusion. We find out live in this episode!
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25: Amazing Stories - 214 - Blue Man Down
In our first experience with Amazing Stories we were treated to a story. It was not amazing. It was predictable but not terrible. We also changed the name of the show because fuck Tales From The Crypt.
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24: Tales From The Crypt - 313 - Spoiled (Live)
So…. this show is just awful? Is that what the lesson here is? We’ve done 14 actual made to be TFTC episodes and liked 2 of them. That’s sad as hell. Please defend your love for this show and we will read it on the air. This is a romance episode without romance, murder, nudity or swearing. No thanks. We cared more about he safety of the bunny than any of the people.
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23: Tales From The Crypt - 103 - Dig That Cat... He's Real Gone
Phoenix hits his breaking point with the show after his seemingly eternal optimism tank goes empty. Jansen feels the same way but isn’t as angry. Dick is completely indifferent. Adam somehow liked this episode more than the last episode. This episodes wastes Joey Pants, Robert Wuhl and Richard Donner. I would rather die 9 times with 8 deaths than watch this again.
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22: Tales From The Crypt - 602 - Only Skin Deep (Live)
What does adding a K into the title mix really add to an episode? More sex and body hair, apparently. Jansen, Adam & Phoenix talk about this episode plus the latter two gentlemen get introduced to a band by the former. We played 8 seconds of the band as to not get banned. Fun fact, we hung out after the show and watched 30 minutes of drummers playing to get the idea. Final result…beh.
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21: Tales From The Crypt - 104 - Only Sin Deep (Live)
Watch as Duck-Fucker Jones sells her face or youth or beauty to a rotten-tooth pawn shop owner for some money. Then she regrets it. Then she kills a guy and tries to buy it back. Stolen jewelry is her collateral and old lady make-up is her reason. Or something? Anyway I can’t believe what the next episode will be…
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20: The Outer Limits - 129 - A Feasibility Study (Live)
Well, we tried. Twitter voted for the best Outer Limits episode and an episode titled A Feasibility Study won. Phoenix, Dick and Adam watched it for all 51 minutes. It was too long and had too many ideas. They tried to like it but were frustrated. Subscribe to our Patron page to listen to our live commentary episode on this one and all previous/future episodes. It’s worth it. Only $1. Anyway, we tried to describe what we witnessed here.
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19: Tales From The Crypt Demon Night (1995) (Live)
So….5 of us watched this movie and tried to talk during it and we probably missed a bunch. Then we dicussed it for way too long and probably missed even more. It is that it is. Join Phoenix, Dick, Jansen, Frank and Adam. It’s about demons. And Knights. And Billy Zane is fun even thought he didn’t show up on the show.
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18: Friday The 13th The Series - 104 - A Cup Of Time (Live)
Adam chose this show and then randomly chose this episode. There is a plant based murder system carried out by a haunted tea cup. Luckily they are in Canada and are never outside of 3 feet from tea or a homeless on a park bench. Then suddenly every character knows where to be because they all read the script. We are joined by Nik of World Class Bullshitters.
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Check out the World Class Bullshitters YouTube page.
17: Tales From The Crypt - 513 - Till Death Do We Part (Live)
Phoenix, Dick, Jansen and Adam watch a John Stamos led episode and as a rare occasion they are entertained thoroughly. If you’ve seen An Occurrence At Owl Creek Bridge then ignore that fact and just go along for the ride. The ride is in the back of a limo with a creepy, horny, old lady.
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