12: Tales From The Crypt - 705 - Horror In The Night (Live)

After over an hour of computer problems we were rewarded for our struggle with this turd of an episode. Imagine if Guy Ritchie made a student film because he loved Tarantino. Imagine a good story told here. Imagine it because it’s the only way you’re getting one. Phoenix, Adam and Frank do their best to describe this turd. SURPRISE she’s gone. Wait, she’s back. SURPRISE there’s blood. Wait no, it’s gone. Aren’t you amazed at the thick plot?

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11: Tales From The Crypt - 314 - Yellow (Live On YouTube)

Our first episode on YouTube and apparently that is our good luck charm because we are amazed to discover a non-terrible episode of TFTC! Seriously. This is our first good episode of the series and we were live to express it.

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10: Tales From The Cryptkeeper - 308 - Drawn And Quartered

Remember Korman’s Kalamity? Welcome back to a drawn version of it. Phoenix is very angry for this one.

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9: Tales From The Crypt - 512 - Half-way Horrible

Well, at least this title sets you up for what to expect. Adam and Phoenix watch as Clancy Brown fights or starts a voodoo conspiracy about making apples last years. Voodoo preservatives? Santaria preservation? Who cares. It sucks.

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8: Tales From The Crypt - 510 - Came The Dawn

We just recorded this episode and I already forgot the plot. Oh wait. Psycho. That’s the plot. Enjoy? Frank and Adam join to break down this episode of Psycho.

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7: Tales From The Cryptkeeper - 312 - Monsters Ate My Homework

Yet another cartoon episode. This time it’s the first one from the 1999 season. A kid lies about monsters eating his homework and then find out monsters have a crack fix for homework that he has to deal with. A real boy who cried monsters.

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6: Tales From The Cryptkeeper - 204 - All The Gory Details

I just don’t get the point of the cartoons. This one features a huge asshole with crabs mentally abusing a woman until she snaps. Oh, I guess there’s something about Frankenstein monsters or something but it’s mostly focused on his crabs.

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5: Tales From The Darkside - 117 - The Madness Room

This is the first of a selection series called Never Go Back. Adam chose a Tales From The Darkside episode and regretted it. He should have listened. He should have listened….

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4: Tales From The Crypt - 403 - On A Deadman's Chest

Don’t get a tattoo otherwise you’ll kill an innocent woman? I guess that’s the lesson here? Or, don’t be a dick lead singer or you’ll have a downfall? It doesn’t add up and the editing is shit. Plus, a CGI dragon will attack you and make you cut off your chest. Beware?!

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3: Tales From The Cryptkeeper - 208 - Growing Pains

Today I’m joined by Etep Wokuian from The Place To Be Reviews to discuss this cartoon episode of Tales From The Cryptkeeper from 1994. It’s the origin story of Poison Ivy like it’s the show Gotham. It flew by and that’s the only good thing I can say about it.

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2: Tales From The Crypt - 309 - Undertaking Palor

Today I’m joined by Etep Wokuian from The Place To Be Reviews to discuss this slightly more adult episode of Tales From The Crypt from 1991. John Glover plays a mortician that eats pizza and fills bodies with chicken and wood chips. Oh, and I guess he murders. This is the Super 8 first draft.

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1: Tales From The Crypt - 213 - Korman's Kalamity

What a way to start off a new podcast. This episode is terrible and makes me regret the decision to review this show. Can’t get any worse right? Watch as a main character doesn’t seem to be involved with the actual episode. Plus, don’t go to the midnight laundromat unless you’re looking to get assaulted right? Right. Joined by Adam Wilcox from Raiders Of The Lost Flicks and Frank from The Indy Sportscar Podcast for this one.

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