This episode is great. No sarcasm there. This episode tells a solid story that doesn't get bogged down with pointless side characters or super long sex scenes with white people. I mean, there is still white-on-white sex but it's minimal. This episode explains SO MUCH that it actually made Phoenix like John Lowe's character and is a crucial turning point in the season. Phoenix took a 7 month break from the show 1 episode before it got awesome. Who would have known?
7: Hotel - 507 - Flicker
This episode is terrible. Great ideas but terrible writing. The 20's scenes are directed really well and the wall idea is great. EVERYTHING else is terrible. Who cares about the random little girl in the hospital? Who cares about the ten commandments killer at this point? Does any of it matter? Will any of it get resolved? This episodes introduces MORE characters that will not have any point later in the season.
6: Hotel - 506 - Room 33
I know. It's been 7 months since the last review. It's because this season is terrible. Phoenix watched 506 and 507 when they originally aired but couldn't bring himself to review the show. But he also didn't want to cancel this review show. So, he decided to finally record. Anyway, this episode is terrible because it's about a baby that doesn't matter in the slightest. It focuses too much on the terrible characters (Alex, Bartholomew, John, Ramona, Swedish girls) and not enough on the great ones (Liz, Tristan, March, Sally, Iris). Plus, John and Alex's daughter is going to have some severe abandonment issues later in life.
5: Hotel - 505 - Room Service
In this episode everyone is becoming a vampire. We have like 40 new vampires to the cast and they are all quickly forgotten about. Also, Phoenix explains his true feelings toward transgender/transvestite people (not his true feelings). He also talks about how much he enjoyed 2/3 of this episode. Millennials are annoying people that are supposed to be killed (or so the show says).
4: Hotel - 504 - Devil's Night
In this episode, Phoenix talks about the boring performance by Wes Bentley, how Evan Peters and Finn Wittrock are the saving graces of the show this season and how awesome of an idea this episode is. Unfortunately this episode is a standalone that is quickly abandoned after it is over. This season is kinda horrible.
3: Hotel - 503 - Mommy
Phoenix and Bri discuss the episode Mommy of American Horror Story, season 5 episode 3. They discuss what they love/hate about the show, what characters they love/hate, and what they are looking forward to in future episodes. They focus for a long time on how much Lady Gaga's character has sex and how it must be in her contract that she fucks every attractive cast member.
2: Hotel - 502 - Chutes And Ladders
The first 15 minutes of Chutes And Ladders was boooooooring but it got much better once Evan Peters took over. We are again without Brent but he will be back next week so don't cry. We discuss how they show too much fake sex in this show, the questions aren't answered that should be and then we speculate on how much we will like the show in the future.
1: Hotel - 501 - Checking In
We started season 5 of American Horror Story and holy shit is it weird/confusing/boring at the same time. We had to run the show without Brent but we had a lot of fun discussing anal raping, Lady Gaga's eyebrows, Wes Bentley's boring performance and other things that are involved with stories, horror and America.